November 28, 2023

Searching for Unforgiveness

Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times, saying, `I repent,' forgive him." Luke 17:3-4

Unforgiveness is like fertile soil for a crop of noxious weeds. It is the source of much that can go sour in personal relationships and, therefore, impacts our relationship with God. Sometimes it’s disguised—for instance, if people say in an angry tone that they have forgiven past offenses, their obvious bitterness betrays them. Unforgiveness can sink into your heart and hide from you; then it can hurt relationships without you ever being aware of it.

Consider these following questions to see if you need to forgive someone:

  • Have you been hoping that a certain person will get what he or she deserves?
  • Do you talk negatively about this individual to others?
  • Do you indulge in fantasies of revenge—even mild ones?
  • Do you mull over what someone did to you?
  • How do you feel if a good thing happens to that individual?
  • Do you blame him or her for how your life turned out?
  • Do you find it hard to be open and trusting with people?
  • Are you frequently angry, depressed, or bitter?
  • Do you find it difficult or impossible to thank God for your offender?

Take a moment to let God examine your heart. Will He find any unforgiveness there?

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